I hate pretty girls so much. They make me so crazy. I know it's just immature jealousy. But I look at myself in the mirror and all I hear is, "Not good enough," "Trashy slut," "Who would want to date you?" I know that my worth should never come from guys. But I realize that there is a positive correlation between how many guys I talk to and how I feel about myself. I had this burst of happiness a few years ago, and I find myself missing it. It doesn't help that my sister is beautiful, my mom is critical and all my friends get hit on all the time. It's not fair!
My boyfriend cares, he does. But there are things he does when I know he's just trying to make me feel better.
This is my problem, my problem inside, and I need to overcome it.
It's just not easy.
Sure, I can get an A++ on an exam and clean 15 cat cages in 45 minutes.
But that won't take me to the Kingdom.
